“It all started when my wife got sick. Before the treatments, she was a tour de force of vitality. I remember when I first met her a yoga retreat. She must have had a hundred daises in her hair. Her smile lit up my world. I thought that I knew happiness before when I was developing properties, but Meredith was a whole another level. I even got out of the property industry so we could start a family. “He sighed as he lit his cigarette. Despite his shaggy appearance his eyes were clear. “I was called crazy for leaving but I would have done it all over again in an instant. “Looking at him I almost felt enchanted.
“Meredith was everything to me. We tried for years to have
children. She was devastated that we were struggling. So, wondering what was
going on we went to the doctor. That’s when I discovered that she had cancer. I
held her hand through every treatment. I spend endless nights by her side just
praying that she might make it through…” he trailed. “I’m sorry.” He shut his
eyes tightly then blinked again.
“No, it’s okay. You’re allowed to feel emotional.”
“Yeah, I guess. It’s just a lot.”
“So, what happened to Meredith?”
“The treatments didn’t work. But that’s not the kicker.” He
let out a coughing wheeze. “While she was undergoing treatment. I started to
get ill. I hadn’t been eating or drinking or even sleeping properly. I blamed
it on the stress until I collapsed in the hospital cafeteria. I don’t remember
exactly what happened, but I was told they ran panels and found out I had
cancer and my organs were starting to fail.”
“I can’t imagine how hard that was,” I said while a newly
arrived Jester poured us coffee from a thermos.
“The plus side is that Meredith and I got to have our
treatments together. The only difference is that I was getting better. They even
gave us a room and put our beds together. The day she died, I climbed in bed
with her and held her until she was gone. Despite all the chemicals and the
hospital smells, I swear I still smelt daisies in her hair.” We sat
in silence for a moment while he munched on some food. He still looked gaunt
and sickly. He lit up another cigarette and sighed.
“The day we finally got to inter her ashes; I was sent home
but then I found out there was nothing to go home too. Apparently, the company
I worked for was sick of waiting for me to heal and decided to terminate me.
They said I had to move from the apartment that they allowed me to staying in
but I couldn’t afford to live anywhere. The treatments had drained our bank
accounts. I only managed to have enough for final expenses for Meredith.”
“That’s shitty! Why did they think that was okay?”
“Back in the day, I probably would’ve done it too. Hell,
maybe I had. Anything for a buck you know?”
“I guess. It’s still pretty heartless.”
“I thought I could make it to the homeless shelter of use
one of the assistance programs. But I got the news that I had not gotten better
at all. I’m dying.”
“You’re dying? Then why stay here?”
“Yeah, all that trouble and god couldn’t even take us out at
the same time.” He gave a throaty
chuckle. I felt a strong of guilt for handing him the pack of cigarettes. “I
couldn’t stay in the graveyard with Meredith. So here was the next best thing.”
“How long ago was that?”
“They gave me a month four months ago.” This was the sandman.
“I don’t understand why I’m still alive.”
“I think I can answer that.”
Now it was my turn to light a cigarette. “But I don’t think you are
going to like the answer.”
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